Hello Darlin'...It's been a long time

You guessed it, I am a closet Conway Twitty lover!! I really do love some of his songs but felt that this blog deserved this title due to my long absence. Wow, can't believe it's been a few months. I have been moving in fast forward since the new year started. First things first, my baby boy turned 10. Double digits! How did this happen?! On the same day, my baby sis got married. I had the most amazing time preparing for her wonderful day (all the bridal shows, the showers, the bachelorette party, the dress fittings were all just so much fun) and then, having the honor to stand next to her on her wedding day. Amazing -- just all so amazing!! (Mandy, don't worry, I will post my toast for you soon.)

No sooner was the wedding over than my new little nephew Jackson arrived...a tad early and without the baby shower that was planned. But as everyone knows, babies do not care about schedules. So instead of spending money on the shower, I went out and bought much needed supplies for Christine and Jackson instead. Sooo much fun!! I did get Christine's personalized "Jackson" bracelet complete along with the personalized burp cloths but still need to finish the quilt. Of course, I think Jackson is as sweet as can be and every time I see pictures I just want to hold him and kiss his cheeks!! The feelings I feel about Jackson surprised me a little. I am already an aunt to Jimmy's sister's three kids but there's something about being an aunt for the first time to your siblings own child that is just amazing!! I wanted to be there for my little brother, emotions running high, can't believe he is a daddy now. I think I probably wore him out texting him everyday to see how my peanut was doing. He, of course, obliged me and even asked a few questions here and there. I feel so honored that he invited me to the hospital to be there waiting when Jackson arrived into this world. Alex just beamed when he saw Jackson and Olivia said "he's beautiful" and even sang him Happy Birthday. Still puts a lump in my throat whenever I think about it!!

So, my life is running full circle...we've had a birth, a marriage and even a death. Jimmy's aunt lost her battle to cancer on March 31st. Her form of cancer was rare and very painful. So thankful she is finally at peace. Such an amazing woman. She will be missed by many! RIP Wanda!

The other craziness going on is something that has brought me many mixed feelings. Jimmy is pursuing his dream of becoming a police officer. He was working towards getting into the City of St. Louis Police when a new Chief took over and changed a few rules. Jimmy became ineligible during the process. That was a sad day in the Morgan household. Emotions were very high for quite some time. However, he is not letting one municipality's "no" stop him. However, and this is a big however, this is also allowing him to obtain his dream in another city and state. We are traveling to Little Rock this weekend for Jimmy to begin his testing with the North Little Rock Police. He will need to pass the written and the physical in order to continue on being eligible. I am so nervous...I hate these big anticipation moments that you have no control over! If he makes it, there is a possibility we will pursue moving to Little Rock. When he and I discussed this at the beginning of the year, I admit, it brought about a new found hope and excitement. I started thinking of being able to afford a home I always wanted (cost of living is so much cheaper there) and being so family-connected. Jimmy's family see's each other often -- almost daily. We dealt with that when his Mom and Dad lived here and a part of me really misses it. Olivia loves playing with her cousins and if given a choice, would move there in an instant. Alex, of course, is not so keen on the idea of moving away from all his friends. So, after all the excitment wore off of this possibility and with the arrival of my new little nephew and the future of my sister starting her family, this endeavor has stirred up mixed feelings. Granted, I have had lots of support from Jimmy's family. All worrying that I will be happy if we move there. I think it will be a huge adjustment and I will miss my sister the most!! Makes me want to cry thinking about it but...OK, let's not speculate. We will have more definite answers after Saturday when we know if Jimmy has passed or not. I pray he passes but only the Lord knows in which direction we are meant to go.

The other big weight on my heart and shoulders is my job. I am just not feeling it. I am totally grateful for having a job and most days do not even let myself think these thoughts for fear that I will become like one of the unfortunate 30 my firm let go in March. But, my heart is just not into it. I feel that I really need to be in more of a creative atmosphere. My sister, aunt and I share a dream and have discussed a possibility but with this economy so sucky right now, we cannot even being to speculate. I do hope one day our dreams do come true!! If not for all of us maybe at least one of us!!

So, that's been my life in a nutshell....kids are doing great. Oh, We have made the decision after speaking with Olivia's teachers that she be held back from attending Kindergarten next year. Jimmy had a really hard time accepting this. He looked at more of her intellect instead of her maturity level. I think we made the right choice. I hope we made the right choice! I pray we made the right choice!!

Before I sign off, I want to extend a very heartfelt THANK YOU to two of my Aunt's - Aunt Debbie and Deb Do. You both are such amazing woman. Each one with traits that I truly admire and that truly inspire! Each one of you holds a special place in my heart and I am so grateful for the relationship that we have. You both inspire me to be just like you to my new little nephew and possible future nieces and nephews. Thank you for always being there for me. And even though I may not always say it, it is forever in my heart...Thank you and Love you!

And, to my sister! You are the best! Thank you for always being there for me and for my kiddos. You mean the absolute world to me!! I am so blessed to not only call you my sis but to also call you my best friend!! Love you!!